Tag Archives: heavy metal

Kuma Schaumburg’s Howl burger

HOWL
Burger of the Month at Kuma’s Schaumburg for July, 2016

  • Crispy potato strings
  • Caramelized onions
  • Merkts sharp cheddar cheese
  • Red wine braised skirt steak
  • 10oz. beef patty
  • Pretzel bun
Kuma's HOWL

Howl burger from Kuma’s Schaumburg

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Kuma Schaumburg’s Vôdûn burger

“Shrunken heads, broken legs, body parts on the concrete,
Cut ’em up butcher style, gators of the swamp.
Red light, leave ’em dead, running like a track meet.
Scared of nobody, what you motherfuckers want?
Believe me when I tell ’em I’m a bogeyman beast,
Leave ’em slashed from their head to their feet.
Pin bricks to the chest of a bitch well fed,
Cooking meat, cannibal trying to eat.”
– Sam B, “Who Do You Voodoo”

VÔDÛN
Burger of the Month at Kuma’s Schaumburg for April, 2016

  • Jamaican jerk marinated flank steak
  • Pineapple salsa
  • Pepperjack cheese
  • Bourbon glazed fried plantains
  • Honey whiskey jalapeño aioli
  • 10oz. beef patty
  • Pretzel bun
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Vodun burger from Kuma’s Schaumburg

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Kuma Schaumburg’s Morghoul burger

“I have learned to feed on treachery like meat and savor loyalty like rare wine. The terror you inspire in the ranks will serve in the place of true fidelity.”
—Vinter Raelthorne IV

MORGHOUL
Limited burger at Kuma’s Schaumburg in collaboration with Privateer Press for Adepticon 2016!

  • Deep fried tomatillos
  • Cayenne pepper
  • Lagunitas IPA Cheddar cheese fondue
  • Candied maple bacon
  • BBQ pulled pork
  • 10oz. beef patty
  • Pretzel bun
MORGHOUL

Morghoul burger from Kuma’s Schaumburg

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Kuma Schaumburg’s Saxon burger

“That’s right, there’s free beer in Irish paradise. Everyone’s jealous.”
Kevin Hearne, “Hammered”, Iron Druid Chronicles

SAXON
Burger of the Month at Kuma’s Schaumburg for March, 2016

  • Fried Egg Sunny Side Up
  • Smoked Gouda cheese
  • Deep fried Brussels sprouts
  • Bacon fat andouille banger
  • Great Lakes Conway’s Irish Red Ale “Neurosis” mushroom gravy
  • 10oz. beef patty
  • Pretzel bun
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Saxon burger from Kuma’s Schaumburg

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Kuma Schaumburg’s Pantera burger

“Out of the steam and the foam and the froth, a man in white with poor eyesight will craft a liquid paradox, and it shall be called the Triple Nonfat Double Bacon Five-Cheese Mocha!”‘
Kevin Hearne, “Hammered”, Iron Druid Chronicles

PANTERA

  • Tortilla strips
  • Roasted poblano peppers
  • Homemade Ranchero salsa
  • Applewood smoked bacon
  • Shredded Monterey jack cheese
  • 10oz. beef patty
  • Pretzel bun
Kuma's Pantera burger

Pantera burger from Kuma’s Schaumburg

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Kuma Schaumburg’s Oozing Wound burger

He’s climbin’ in your window, 
He’s snatchin’ your people up.
– Antoine Dodson “Bed Intruder Song”

OOZING WOUND
Burger of the Month at Kuma’s Schaumburg for February, 2016

  • Arugula salad seasoned with citrus vinaigrette
  • Jumbo crab cake infused in Half Acre Pony Pilsner
  • Roasted peppers
  • Red onions
  • Pickle aioli remoulade
  • 10oz. beef patty
  • Pretzel bun
oozing wound

Oozing Wound burger from Kuma’s Schaumburg

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Kuma’s Corner’s Ministry burger

Thanks for vast herds of bison to kill and skin leaving the carcasses to rot.
Thanks for bounties on wolves and coyotes.
Thanks for the American dream,
To vulgarize and to falsify until the bare lies shine through.
William S. Burroughs “A Thanksgiving Prayer”

MINISTRY
Special Burger at Kuma’s Corner for December, 2015

  • Fresh thyme garnish
  • Bacon fat aioli
  • Smoked applewood bacon
  • Caramelized onions and mushrooms
  • Red wine gravy
  • Fried smoked gouda cheese 
  • 10oz. beef patty
  • Pretzel bun
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Ministry burger from Kuma’s Corner

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Kuma’s Corner’s Christ Killer burger

When we killed your savior we felt no remorse.
We didn’t think twice as we buried his corpse ,
Only about what we could afford,
With the silver we got for betraying the Lord.

Christ Killer “Christ Killer”

CHRIST KILLER
Burger of the Month at Kuma’s Corner for December, 2015

  • Fried pita chips
  • Hariassa aioli
  • Avocado tabouli
  • Roasted tomato
  • Feta cheese
  • Kebab spice rub
  • 10oz. beef patty
  • Pretzel bun
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Christ Killer burger from Kuma’s Corner

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End of Hiatus and The Reviews That Never Happened

Happy New Year, yada, yada, yada, my dear readers. Hopefully 2015 is a good one for ya and I’m seriously hoping that one of your New Year’s Resolutions is to eat more awesome burgers and consume as many extravagant libations as humanly possible!

My New Year’s found me in…. Guangzhou, China of all places. I’m here for “Business” for at least the next 6 months and I’m already checking off crazy food items off of my “bucket list”, so stay tuned for reviews of things that stray from the usual coverage of burgers (though China DOES make some mean burgers. You’ll see, you’ll see, no worries). Scorpions, snake blood mixed with the local jet fuel “rice” “wine” , wine distilled from mare’s and cow’s milk, grasshoppers – those are just some of the things that I’ve experienced in the previous 30 days and my Epicurean journey has barely just begun.

I know I’ve been inactive for some time – just chalk that one off to the hectic, busy months before I had to pack my bags and leave for China. There ARE quite a few things I had the chance to devour shamelessly, but unfortunately I don’t think that reviewing them right now would be super relevant or interesting. SO, I’ll just show them off with this nifty little collage I made and I’ll leave it at that for now.

No, I’m not dead. I’m simply abroad, and now that things have settled down a bit I’ll be bombarding your feeds with update after update. China style.

Collage.jpg

 

Starting from the top left and ending with the bottom right, though posted in nor particular order..
Zombie Burger’s ATOMIC DOG – quite the HOT dog if you ask me.
Oddfellow’s THE ODDFELLOW which is exactly what it looks like: two patties sandwiched between two glazed donuts.
Kuma’s Corner’s CHURCHBURN complete with a beautiful Sriracha sauce pentagram..
Kuma’s Corner’s VEKTOR for that Philly cheese steak + burger otherwordly combination!
Kuma’s Too’s FLESHCRAWLER to celebrate the festivities of Octoberfest the way it’s meant to be celebrated.
Kuma’s Corner’s EXODUS which was a tongue-searing one-night-only special burger!
Rockit Bar and Grill’s ROCKIT BURGER with its Wagyu Kobe beef all smothered in Brie cheese… Mmmmm.
Kuma’s Too’s BLACK SABBATH, because it was time to try one of the Kuma’s staples.
Kuma’s Corner’s SLEEP – the yearly Thanksgiving turkey genocide contributor.

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Kuma’s Corner’s ABSU burger

ABSU

  • Breaded deep fried chiles
  • Queso fresco
  • Red onion and avocado relish
  • Pepperjack cheese
  • Tomatillo salsa
  • 10 oz. beef patty
  • Pretzel bun
Kuma's Corner ABSU burger

ABSU burger from Kuma’s Corner

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